Chapter 7: Dear Son


Unconditional love flows naturally towards parents and children. No matter how they are, I love them dearly. I want them to be happy from the bottom of my heart. I would do anything for them. The only people I have a right and a duty to be an adviser and a guide to are my children. Whatever I say to them, whether I scold them, or say "No" to them, is for their good, without being afraid of being disliked, because unconditional love is always about the other person. I just want to hug my son and tell him I love so much! I want to write a letter to my son, something that will be with him whenever he needs me, even after I am no more...

Dear Son,

21 years ago in a hospital room in Chicago you came into this world! It was Sharad Purnima, full moon night, and your face was as beautiful as the full moon... I am so grateful to Krishna that on Sharad Purnima he gave me such a tender loving soul. Your name maybe Varun but for me you are Chaitanya. Love you dearest one. You're a part of my soul!

I have known you longer than anyone else, from the time you were in my womb. I know who you are, your essence, I know you to the core! You are a wonderful, gentle, loving human being, with a beautiful heart! Remember this. In a lot of ways you are wiser than me, better in the ways of the world and in dealing with people.

The only thing I would say to you is "BE HAPPY!". That's the only thing that matters, everything else will come and go and doesn't matter. We can get over every hurdle, we can live past every challenge, every problem, every pain. Keep your mind free! Be simple and natural. Happiness comes from being simple and natural.

Don't be caught up in the web of your mind. Be yourself. All philosophies finally give you this message. So don't get tangled in so much deep thinking that you loose yourself into delusions and illusions. And no matter how much the mind fabricates, intellectualizes and convinces, remember you are not the mind! The mind is like mist, the warmth of the heart is like the sun, when it dawns the mist disappears, the veil lifts and you see your true self. So live from your heart, and the heart is not complicated like the mind. Your mind especially is very complex and puts so many labels on yourself. I know who you are, trust me. Drop the mind when reflecting within, use your mind for working in the world.

When you are unhappy, sad, it is because you are focusing on yourself. Make someone happy, keep your focus on serving others. Remember to be compassionate and live your life for others. In changing times, this is the only wealth you'll have. And when you make others happy you will find fulfillment and misery will disappear. Just go and volunteer in a soup kitchen for example, you will find instant upliftment, so many energy will come to you, and you will feel so happy. When you are low, negative, when you're feeling down, or have a sinking feeling, don't fight the darkness, light a candle.

What I tell you are also things I need to work on myself. So it is also my own realization on what needs improvement, like compassion. It's just about compassion beta. It is compassion that makes us human. Otherwise we are just a piece of flesh with an ego. These are the simple values to live by, no need for complicated philosophies. All other virtues flows from compassion I think. The closer a person is to you, the more negativities you will see in them. You need to love people not because of what they are but inspite of what they are. Take it for granted that you are compassionate, that you ARE compassion. Ice melts to become water again, vapor condenses back to water, water always returns to it's natural state, so to return to your compassionate and happy self, it's your natural state! You know it, you have tasted it. How to go back to it? Just relax, rest, reflect, let go...and  see. Nature will make you flow back to this state.

Compassion starts with yourself, be kind to yourself. Be full with love and respect for the divine form that you are. Others can love you only as much as you love yourself. Love yourself unconditionally. Repeat this mantra, "God loves me, my parents love me, I am a divine being in human form, I am love, peace, bliss".

Only compassion evaporates the ego in all it's forms. Only love dispels all delusions, illusions and impressions of the mind. It is love that drops you from the head to the heart, to the seat of the soul.
Remember a compassionate heart is not weak. It is like blazing fire. It is the will of the Lord. It's brilliance is that of a thousand suns and darkness dare not come near it. Be strong yet sensitive, like a powerful yet compassionate king who will serve his people but will also raise arms to defend his kingdom and himself. In fact only love can bring true lasting strength, because it is the only thing which is one pointed without conflict or ego. Have that unwavering, love within. It is a conviction of the self.

While feeling free inside (Mukti) and knowing that you are love (Bhakti) balance it equally when engaging outside. For the outside you need two main things, strength/energy/dynamism (Shakti) and skill in dealing with people and situations (Yukti). So one needs to be practical and excel in the world also, it's absolutely necessary to have equal balance inside and outside, between the ideal and real, between theoretical and practical, between knowledge and action.
For action one needs energy. Being lazy in the mind can be instantly removed by raising your energy level. Do some physical exercises also in addition to Pranayamas and meditation. You eat healthy food already so that is another source of energy. I look at your room as a reflection of the state of your mind. If your room is clean and organized I know you are in a good frame of mind. You just need to develop strength of mind using your will, sharp intellect and all of the above. You already have good awareness and skill in dealing with people. Keep learning people skills from personalities who have to deal with a lot of people. Improve your communication skills, respond and keep in touch with people. The most important thing is see things from the other person's perspective, then you will respond appropriately.

With regards to inside and outside, don't look for perfection in the world outside. Your inner core is perfect and be with that perfection in the soul. You are looking for a job after you graduate, remember, you will never find a perfect job, or a perfect company, or a perfect boss. You are also not going to be the perfect employee. In life nothing will be 10/10, at most they will be 8 out of 10. You decide what 8 are important to you. Take interest in your job, keep your commitment to your company and job. Do your duty it is more important than short term happiness. Remember that those who have employed you are also human beings like you, don't betray them. Don't quit a job in haste because you think it's not ideal. The next job may be worse than the one you left. First few jobs are going to be trivial. Be patient, persistent, and consistent. If you are is consistency then intelligence and ideas will bear fruit. So you need to sustain whatever you undertake. You do your best and do justice to your job to satisfying yourself.

The fastest way to become unhappy and lose hope is too look for perfection in the world. To the level you are comfortable with imperfect people, imperfections at work, imperfections in the whole world - to that level you have matured as a human being. How? With compassion n skill. Hug imperfection with dispassion! Only intentions can be perfect not actions. You need to work on making imperfect things better, so keep your focus on what you want to do and do your best. Not just talk, the world looks at your achievements and so do you. Remember give your 100% and never even think about the result, let alone being driven by the outcome of your efforts. Your expectations for the results will in fact suffocate your efforts and give you a lot of stress. You will never regret any loss if you have put in your 100% but will regret if you have not put in your 100%. Haven't you experienced this? Then why suffer?

Be strong and self confident. How to develop self confidence? Firstly don't listen to the opinion of others, including your parents. I have said so many things to you also, but drop them and move on. Never take anyone's negativity seriously, close the shutters when it comes your way, because their negativity will go away and it will stay in you. So it's better you shun others negativity with strength and dispassion. You have also been angry and opinionated about others. Do you hold on to that? Yet they may remember what you said. Everyone is equally good and bad. We are all in the same boat. You also have opinions about others. Just like you give your opinion about others, sometimes lightly and forget, so do others. Don't hang on to what others think about you. If they dislike you it's their bad Karma. You do your Karma.

The other thing about self confidence is to be proud of your achievements, and respect your virtues, they are God's virtues in you. Inside u is an eternal light, a living pulsating consciousness, gentle love and soothing grace. Bask in its abundance. You often count all your short comings, but never the your great qualities and achievements. So be positive in your outlook.. How? Keep your energy high and you will automatically be in a positive mindset. You also need to train the mind, over and over again. Your mind is like a wild horse you need to train it, then ride it and keep a tight check on it like rein on a horse.

Compare yourself with those who are lesser than you, only to boost your confidence, not to become arrogant! I look around and realize that you have done so much more than others and are such a beautiful human being!

Why are you so tough on yourself? Treat yourself like you would treat your beloved. Be forgiving to yourself but learn from your mistakes. In fact if you don't forgive yourself you will do the same mistake over and over again. You will be driven by guilt into a vicious loop of  self blame, negativity and these impressions will drive you to further mistakes. So accept your mistakes with kindness to yourself and with strength, resolve and train the mind to make the right choices. Remember the consequences of your mistakes. It takes discipline, toughness, self effort, will power and remembering the consequences of past mistakes to say "NO!" to yourself, to stop yourself from making further mistakes. You have tremendous strength and will power, I have seen it, use that sword to cut the laziness in your mind.

You can also develop strength and foster your self confidence by making small commitments, "Today I will....". Take small steps, don't try to overhaul yourself with unconventional methods or swing from one end to the other. Remember your parents when you feel dis-balanced to re-center yourself. Ask yourself, what would my parents think if I did this, or what would my parents have done in my situation?

Weak people hang out with weak people, don't do that. Misery seeks company. Those who are unhappy, confused, not doing too well in life, or escaping from facing the tough world, will not give you any strength, confidence or inspiration. Without intimidation, make friends with and be in company of the strong, wise, successful and conventional people. They will take you upward. The company you keep has a huge influence on you.

Bow down, do Pranaam, to Bhagawan (God) every day. If you can have a puja place (shrine) where you can have a few sacred moments, close your eyes and pray. Then touch the feet of the Lord, bowing the head. This brings a tremendous amount of humility, reverence and kindles that divinity within us. When love is directed to the divine it will be ever pure and free of pain. It is the only love worth living for. Emotional love is a mirage, do not chase it, it will lead you astray and leave you thirsty and weak. In relationships always have compassion without attachment, even with your lady love, your children, and your parents.
Our scriptures say : worship your mother as God, worship your father as God, worship your Guru as God, and worship your guest as God. If you have this attitude, willingly, you will receive a tremendous amount of love and blessings in your live always.
You must read the Bhagavad Gita - it has everything you need. The first chapter is Arjun in despair, sometimes you have also been in the same state. Krishna gives such a strong message in the next few chapters. Now that you are entering the Karma yoga phase of your life, which is the grahasta ashram, where you do work in the world and raise a family, these chapters will serve you well.

So much wisdom! Oh my God! You must be overwhelmed reading it! Take it lightly and just have fun this life time. We think we have to do this and that, but should we be so serious about life and try to control it? One day when Papa and I were walking we saw a father pushing his son's toy bike from behind, the boy was busy peddling but the peddles were not connected to the wheels! Just like that we are busy peddling through life, but really it's God pushing our bike from behind, He is taking us through this "World's Carnival", and though we should keep peddling, we should just smile and enjoy!

Always remember one thing, your parents love you no matter what. Doesn't matter sometimes we scold you, but you must confide in us. We are the only ones in the world who truly care about what's best for you. Know that you can take us for granted, you can be with us, this will always be your home no matter how far you may go in the world or how long you are away. Family is always family, others come and go. I am always there for you my dearest one!

With love,
Your Mama

Chapter 6: O Krishna! Giridhari! 


The only reason I am human is to experience this devotion. Liberation I can gain even after I leave the body! Like sweetness is to sugar, devotion is to me. Nothing exists in this world for me except for my beloved Krishna! The moment I remember Him, His presence is with me. My yearning becomes devotion, my conversations become poetry, our union becomes bliss. Those who have experienced will know, for those who haven't, I can't explain! Fortunate are those who in human birth have felt this devotion for the Lord!

The most brilliant expression of consciousness is devotion. God created a mirror to see His love, the reflection was the a beautiful maiden brimming with devotion. In this divine love God embedded the highest wisdom, an essence of Himself. Devotion is an intense longing for the beloved. Devotion is the urge to merge with the divine. Devotion is an intoxication with the nectar of divine love, the cup of the heart overflowing with bliss. Without the juice of devotion all knowledge, all sadhana (spiritual practices) are dead and dry like saw dust.

Love seeks devotion, devotion seeks bliss.
All my desires for love from others is actually seeking divine love. Wanting love from others suffocates. That desire for the perfect love, for an unlimited love, for the unconditional love, to fill an emptiness within, to quench an unending thirst, is like chasing a mirage for water. People are not perfect, their love is not unconditional. I end up only with tears, heartaches and deep sadness. When I realize that the love that I seek is the love of the divine, suddenly there is freedom, expansion, relief, and a smile on my face! That emptiness inside is filled instantly with sweet love, I want to love Him endlessly, no matter how much I try to express my love for Him it is incomplete. That strong urge for His presence, that pleading and prayer, my soul cries, "Oh Krishna! Be with me! Come to me! Govind! Govind!! Govind!!!" Tears of love and yearning roll down my face...

When I was a little girl in Delhi I went with my family to a exhibition of Krishna's paintings, I think it might have been by Hare Rama Hare Krishna organization. I still remember looking at a painting of Krishna stealing butter from a pot and I was so mesmerized that I got lost completely in Him and forgot everything around me. My parents left the hall and were about to leave when they realized I was not with them. They came looking for me and found me starring into the painting! Krishna is my best friend, he is always with me.

I remember when we were in Zambia, we had just returned from a trip to India and my mother had bought a sandalwood statue of Krishna as a gift. I still vividly remember the day when I said to my mother that I would like to keep that statue and not give it to anyone. I must be around 12. I used to hold that Krishna statue in my hand, put on Krishna bhajans, sing and dance with Him. One day in my room He looked so alive in the statue, I asked Him, "is it You?", "If it's you then make your shadow disappear" and it did. So innocent, pure and beautiful where those moments that I shared with Krishna as a little girl. Inside me in a sacred space there is that little girl who lives inside Krishna and within whom there is only Krishna. Whenever I am in deep despair I hold his statue close to my heart and cry, put him on my pillow and sleep.


Each one of us is natural lover, it is the easiest thing to be...
Each one of us attempts to express it differently, but love cannot be expressed...
Each one of us has a definition of love, at different times, for different people, but love cannot be defined...
Each one of us loves someone or something, so deeply, so passionately, but love cannot be found...Where are you, my love, whom I seek and for whom my soul cries, since eons I have longed for you...O my beloved quench this thrist so I may merge with you and be One and Whole! So that there is non other than you in all creation and I will merge with I and roam free and high! Till then I sing in a trance of love... Till then I dance in a play of love. The angels envy, I am here in your company, and experience the colors of love in ecstacy!


At the pinnacle of devotion is liberation
At the pinnacle of knowledge is Divine Love
In Divine Love knowledge is inherent
Without love knowledge is meaningless....


For a devotee this duality is a play, devotion or divine love needs an external God, but in divine love, in bliss and ecstacy the devotee merges into the divine and becomes One. For a Gyani there is no duality - he knows he is God - Aham Brahmasmi. No matter what the path the journey ends in Oneness and one realizes that He is Love, He is Knowledge. 

Raas Leela of Krsna and the Gopis the eternal cosmic celebration...the dance of duality. Krishna is mine only mine! I am dissolving in devotion....merging into my charming Krsna...oh! I am drunk with this bliss! ..and in the height of this ecstacy i become unconscious, nothing remains just His cool divine loving presence :) leave me here I am satisfied, I am finally at rest, my heart at home...


The mind drops to the heart becomes meditation...
The heart longs, oh! my beloved, blossoms into devotion...
These tears of devotion... become precious pearls...
In the dance of trance unbecome...merge...transend...

The sage Narad in his Bhakti Sutras - The Aphorisms of Love explains the nine forms of devotion:

1. Sravaam listening to Bhagavat Katha or glories of the Lord.
2. Kīrtanam singing God’s glories.
3. Smaraam remembering HIM in our minds.
4. Pādasevanam. serving the Lotus Feet of the Lord.
5. Arcanam which is worshipping the idol form of God.
6. Vandanam – paying obeisance to HIM by detaching himself from other distractions and offers his undivided attention.
7. Dāsyam in which the devotee considers himself as a humble servant of the Lord and is ever ready to serve HIM without the slightest idea of receiving anything in return.
8. Sākhyam In this kind of devotion the devotee reaches to that height or level whereupon he starts considering the Lord as his friend.
9. Atmanivedanam in which the devotee offers himself completely to God thinking whatever God does is right.

Around the 15th century there was a burst of devotion on earth with Sufis and Hindu saints singing love poems for the divine. Buddha was was wise, enlightened and complete. Devotional saints Chaitanya and Meera experienced ecstasy, danced, sang and they were also enlightened and complete. They experienced the highest state of devotion, "What am I without You?". This body is capable of both wisdom and devotion. Devotion is not to be explained or understood, devotion is a poem to be sung! 


Meera Bai

Meera bai epitomizes Bhakti (devotion). Her unwavering love for her Krishna was the most beautiful, even Krishna would helplessly be drawn to her. Her conversations with Krishna, came out as love poems Bhajans, and are remembered even today. For a devotee all love songs are bhajans (devotion songs) and all bhajans are love songs. She did not want to get married but was married to Rajasthani Mewar prince Bhoj Raj when she was 13. She was not interested in married life, for her no one existed except Krishna. Her husband was a nice person, he built Meera a temple for her Krishna. He died a few years after the their marriage in war. Meera's father-in-law liked and protected Meera. After he died Meera's older brother-in-law and other in-laws were very unjust to Meera and tortured her. She was also a rebel and an unconventional woman. She never let go of devotion for Krishna not matter how much anyone tried. In the bleakest time of her life when her in-laws rebuked her and her own family didn't want her back is when she sang the bhajan, "Mere to Giridhar Gopal dusaro na koi". I don't know why her life was full of so much misery. Finally she decided to leave her in-laws, one night she left the fort of Chittaur with deep pain in her heart, "Why don't they understand why I love Him so much?" For many days hungry and thirty she traveled through the desert. She spent sometime in the home town of Krishna, Mathura and Vrindavan. She always wanted to find a Guru and gain knowledge. Saint Chaitanya's disciple in Mathura refused to initiate her into meditation saying that she was a woman. To him she said, "I thought the only male in this universe is Krishna, the rest female". She then went to Varanasi and was initiated by Saint Tulsidas. It was after this she sang, "Payoji maine Naam ratan dhan payo. Vastu amolik di mere Sat Guru, kiripa kar apanayo". "Naam" is when a disciple is given the meditation mantra from their Guru. She finally went to Krishna's kingdom, Dwarka in Gujarat. Her youngest brother-in-law, Udai, had now built a new capital, Udaipur, with beautiful palaces and wanted Meera bai to come back. He sent a few people to Dwarka to convince her. She was so happy in Dwarka and didn't want to go back. At night she entered the Dwarka Deesh mandir and in her supreme glory, her one-pointed devotion for Krishna and intense longing to unite with him, she did, all that was there was light, no matter. When the priests went in to look for her all they found were her garments. She left when she was around 50. 

If you asked me to choose between this love and knowledge, I would choose love. Knowledge seems so cold, dry and pales in comparison with the love song, dance and celebration with the divine! Meditation? Come feel this ecstasy, the elation, the bliss when a lover merges with the beloved. It is electrifying. This too is samadhi -  a sweet samadhi - not that emptiness. 
Meera reads the love of Radha and Krishna in the Geet Govind:

Kabir

I love another saint of the 15th century, Kabir. He wrote such simple yet wise poems which spur an individual to look for a deeper meaning to life. Here is one of my favorite poems of sant Kabir:

Sufis
Sufism is a devotional mystical dimension of Islam. Sufi poems and music is so close to my heart. I wish that this would once again evolve in the Muslim culture. The wisdom that is embedded in the love poems of the Sufis is the most beautiful and heart moving. There are so many old Sufi poems and contemporary Sufi songs that I listen to. Rumi is one of the most revered Sufi saints, known for his mystic style. Rumi's poems elegantly and consistently touch our inner being and inspire us to go beyond our limitations towards the Divine. Rumi believed in the religion of love. Here is one the Rumi poems I like:

I love a contemporary Sufi singer, Abida Parveen. She is like a Sufi herself, see her immerse herself and sing as though in a trance.

Krishna expounds Bhakti to Arjun in the Bhagavad Gita Chapter 12. Krishna talks about a ladder of Bhakti. Doing each action as an offering in a Puja (prayer) to the divine is Karma Yoga. Taking what comes as Prasaad (God's offering). A Swamiji explained Karma Phal (fruits of actions) so well - he said Karma Phal is a technical term which means drop the worries and anxieties for the future. Keep your mind in the present, action is done in the present. If the mind is free from worries, anxieties then it is calmer and more focused and less dissipated to act. Worrying about the future takes away so much energy of the mind. When Vasanas are 80% then drop the worries. They become 60% then do Karma Yoga, the mind and Vasanas get more purified. Then at 40% do Abyasa, practice, to bring back the wandering mind again and again. I think for that Pranayama and focus on breath is good. Then when 20% Vasanas are there mind can be purified through meditation, contemplation. Then Krishna explains that knowledge is more important than abyasa, meditation more important than knowledge. The highest form of devotion being meditation on the formless, cosmic consciousness.  And renouncing the fruits of action more important than meditation. Peace immediately follows. This is the ladder of Bhakti. 

Devotion is a shadow of the Self. This devotee is nothing but You, this love I feel inside is nothing but You, this longing for You is nothing but You, this offering is nothing but You, You are the goal, it's all You oh Lord! Bhakti is like a Yagya. 
Brahma arpanam Brahma havir
Bramha agnou Bramhan ahutham
Brahmeva thena ghantavyam
Bramha Karma Samadina" --Bhagavad Gita 4.24

Brahman is the process of giving, that which is being offered is also Brahman; by Brahman (me) it is offered into Brahman and united.

Brahman is to be attained by seeing Brahman in all actions.

There are different stages a devotee evolves through. First there is a need for a form, as the heart fills and mind only in Him the devotee sees the divine in all forms and everywhere. The devotee then sees the divine as the essence behind all of creation and worships Him as the formless. As the devotee merges and dissolves he becomes one with the divine. This is the ultimate knowledge, and at the climax of devotion there is only this ultimate truth of Oneness. 


Devotion is unconditional love between me and the divine and at the peak of devotion, the merging into the divine one becomes unconditional love, bliss. In my life I have experienced this devotion and this unconditional love with my mother, my son and my Guru.

Chapter 5 : God, Guru and Self are synonymous

Chitram Vata tharor mole, vruddha Sishya, Guror Yuva, Gurostu mounam vykhyanam, Sishyasthu china samsaya
It is strange to see, The very old disciples, And the very young teacher, Who sit under a banyan tree, With the teacher always observing silence, And the students getting all the doubts cleared.
Om nama pranavarthaya, Suddha jnanaika moorthaye nama, Nirmalaya prasanthaya, Sri Dakshinamurthaye nama.
Salutations to that Dakshinamurthy, Who is the meaning of the pranava, “om”, Who is the personification of unalloyed wisdom, Who is crystal clear in his thought, And who is the epitome of peace.
Gurave sarva lokaanam, Bishaje bhava roginaam, Nidhaye sarva vidhyanam, Sri Dakshinamurthaye nama.
Salutations to that Dakshinamurthy, Who is the teacher of the entire world, Who is the doctor to those, Afflicted by the disease of birth and death

Ishvaro Gurur Athmethi Moorthy Bhedha Vibhagine Vyomavath Vyaptha Dehaya Sri Dakhinamurthaye Namaha
Self, Guru and GOD – are one and the same thing with three differentforms. To that Dakshinamurthy (who is the first Guru of all Gurus) who represents these three forms and who has a body all-pervading like space – I offer my salutations.
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naaraayaNaM padmabhavaM vasishhThaM shaktiM cha tatputraparaasharaM cha
vyaasaM shukaM gauDapadaM mahaantaM govindayogiindramathaasya shishhyam
shrii shaMkaraachaaryamathaasya padmapaadaM cha hastaamalakaM cha shishhyam
taM troTakaM vaarttikakaaramanyaan asmataguruun santatamaanatosmi
shrutismR^itipuraaNaanaaM aalayaM karuNaalayaM
namaami bhagavatpaadaM sha~NkaraM lokasha~Nkaram
sha~NkaraM sha~Nkaraachaarya keshavaM baadaraayaNam
suutrabhaashhyakR^itau vande bhagavantau punaH punaH
gururbrahmaa gururvishhNur gururdevo maheshvaraH
guruHsaakShaat parambrahma tasmai shrii gurave namaH
shrii+ brahmanandam parama sukhadam kevalam GYaanmurtim
vishvaatiitaM* gagana sadrisham tattvamasyaadi lakshyam
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The Atman, the enlightened Guru, and Brahman are all one! And that is all there is. An enlightened master is considered the same as Brahman.The first thing that scriptures say is that one must have an enlightened master to take us to the goal of self realization. Hinduism has the tradition of Guru and student (Shishya). All Gurus, Rishis of the Vedas, even Krishna, when giving knowledge never claim that it's their knowledge but  that, "We have heard from the wise ones", or "learnt from my Guru". The knowledge is passed down from Guru to student through thousands of years. The first Guru, who was never is a student is Narayana, in the Vaishnav tradition, and Dakshina Murthy, in the Shaivite tradition.

Hinduism talks about the concept of a "Guru" as its also necessary to learn from a wise person, and not using my own logic and interpretation which may mislead me to wrong conclusions. Therefore I need to learn spirituality from a spiritual master like learning Math from a Math professor. It was very common for each person, family, and king to have a spiritual Guru. The Hindi word "Anath" commonly known as orphan, actually means one without a Guru. Lost without wisdom.

Guru need not be in physical form. When a qualified student asks a sincere question from a pure heart - he will get the answer. Knowledge can come as revelations from within and also from the whole world. However; the best is that from a realized master. 

When that desire for being free is so strong and sincere, a right master is given by nature not that one can choose a master. It could also come from previous merits (Karma) but since it's too complicated and there's no way for me to verify.  Like a student in a particular class in school an appropriate teacher is assigned, with that faith I know nature will bring to me the right one. 

An enlightened Guru is the only one who can raise a student to enlightenment and also to express the knowledge of enlightenment. A professor with a Bachelors degree can't teach to PhD students. If a Guru is a Siddha - a perfected yogi, he can raise a student only to his level - not to enlightenment. 

For me the master I am given, not chosen, is Sri Sri Ravi Shankar, or Gurudev, as I like to respectfully address him. I am ever so grateful to him for giving me so much knowledge and compassion. I have gained so much on my spiritual path from him. I have a long list of praise and admiration for him, he is the optimal human, "Purushottam". He is a Sat Guru to so many. Guru means one who removes darkness or ignorance, and brings you on the path of truth. He has brought so many to the spiritual path and done so much for others. I am happy to be a drop in the ocean of bliss.

Gurudev's knowledge is in line with the ancient scriptures and saints. He has brought the scriptures alive with fresh, modern, simple and practical wisdom. He has also brought tools and techniques apt for this day and age. The famous one being the Sudarshan Kriya, a pranayama. One should always be grateful for all the knowledge one has gained and drink the nectar that such saints have to offer to the world.

I can't meet Brahman/God, or converse with Him, then how do I learn, ask questions, and interact with God? I would be so lost if it was not for Gurus. This is unique to Hinduism, that in addition to priests there are spiritual masters, Gurus. A person who has done Bachelors degree can't teach me PhD level stuff, only an enlightened person can raise me to his level. So where do I find such an enlightened master? How do I know if he's enlightened?

More than a decade ago when I was so consumed by my consulting business, we had just moved to the bay area. One day I asked myself, "What am I doing? This is not me, this is not my nature, not the purpose of my life. I want to pursue spirituality. I want to go back to that inner pursuit and make it the focus of my life. I need to look for an organization, a Guru...". That's when one of my close friends, Madhu, introduced me to the Art of Living. I was looking to learn meditation, a serious advanced study of scriptures, etc.! Quite funny now that I look back. When she said the Art of Living course was about breathing exercises I thought it's way too elementary for me and told my husband to take the course. He had been curious about spirituality after marrying me and thought this would be a good introductory class for him. A very close friend, Indu, was also living with us at the time. Both my husband and her signed up for the one that was held in our area. When they came home after the first Sudarshan Kriya, they looked so transformed! My husband was glowing and he was so calm and peaceful .I was quite taken aback with their presence and asked what happened, what did they do. They described their experiences, it was quite amazing. I wanted the same experience and decided to do the course right away. I had a long conversation with the Art of Living teacher, Nancie, who had taught my husband's class. I took the Art of Living course September, 1999, in Milpitas, with my wonderful teachers, Neha and Ravi. The Sudarshan Kriya definitely had an effect on me. I remember driving home and feeling quite empty, blank, yet so peaceful. I remember my son giving me a hard time, being irritable and for the first time it didn't phase me. I didn't get angry or agitated for many days. From there I was on a fast track. I took the Advance Course in Monterey during Thanksgiving. I had gone with Indu. I had such deep experiences which I haven't had since. I enrolled myself in the Ashtavakra series which was basically a group watching the commentary by Sri Sri Ravi Shankar once a week. I loved the knowledge and that's what attracted me to Art of Living and Sri Sri. The first time I met Sri Sri was in Lake Tahoe in 2000 during Guru Purnima. I whispered something to him on stage when I went to get his blessings, and then during a group session with new people I asked him a question, quite deliberately to have an interaction with him. Anyway that was the start of my journey with Sri Sri. I feel a special connection and subtle communication with him, sometimes I feel he's a mirror of what's happening within me. I don't know who he is, but like a child trusts and loves the mother without knowing, I do too. In my first email to him I said, "Guide me till I reach the final goal, take me to mySelf".

A disciple or a devotee has closeness as well as respect, both combined in one - Sri Sri

The Ashtavakra Gita is a Vedantic text of the highest order, and it satisfied my thirst for knowledge with sweet nectar. I have gone through many commentaries on various scriptures and found them to be the ultimate in knowledge. If I could implement even one statement completely 100% I would be free. Reading Yoga Vasistha was like reading a science fiction novel! But really I find it the ultimate in the knowledge on truth.

Knowledge is spherical. It is all encompassing. There is conceptual knowledge, experiencial knowledge and existential state of wisdom. Most of the time I am in the first two categories. An enlightened Guru is in the last one, established in consciousness. When I meditate sometimes I get a sense of that substratum within me, the equilibrium when all oscillation has stopped. Just being and being a witness. All experience is the realm of the world so all spiritual experiences can be null and voided as an experience of the truth. There is no time or space or thought or anything there. Like going into a black hole. When you travel at the speed of light nothing exists. Everything that exist, time, space is slower than speed of light and mind is faster than speed of light. When one rests in that equilibrium of the speed of light everything disappears. That is the Guru tattva - the essence of truth, the light of wisdom. I don't see a Guru as a body, as a personality, I see the Guru as the presence of consciousness wrapped in a physical form. Like magnets attract, my soul charges towards this bright brilliance of the Guru. There is a magnetic connection - a subtle yet strong bond between the Atman and the enlightened one. Like two black holes on the surface that lead to eternity, cosmic consciousness, Brahman.  

The Guru is like the window, the sky is consciousness/God. To see the sky I need a window through which to see. Through that window the light of the sun comes in. One who has a window in the house they live are lucky, for they can see the brilliance of the sun through that window. Being grateful to the ones who give me love unconditionally is one the most beautiful feelings of human experience. The melting of the self in complete surrender is the epitome of devotion and reverence. Such grace flows that it's like the Niagara Falls. That connection, the oneness of Self and Guru is what is this ancient tradition of Guru and disciple.

India has seen such beautiful Guru traditions, and the Gurus are innumerable. The ancient Rishis (seers) were all over the globe and this knowledge was universal, there was no country or religion thousands of years ago. The great Kapilla Rishi lived in what is now California. Some were in Nova Scotia. Nova Scotia comes from the Sanskrit root Nav Kosha or nine Koshas (a Vedic measurement) from the center of time which is Ujjain. Why Ujjain because that is where the axis of time, Maha Kaaleshwar, resides. There were Rishis in Germany also. This is my ascertainment from what I have read and heard.  

I bow to all the Gurus from the start of time to the present day, may You take this offering of love and reverence at your feet....

Jai Guru Dev